Two weeks ago, I took Audrey on a trip to my former home of NYC. Our visit coincided with a record breaking heat wave of sweltering temperatures and stifling air. The shot we took (left, Photo Credit: A.Valcourt) tried to capture that feeling of hot and sweat from the elevated 7 train platform. We still had a great time.
     I never could afford to attend any Broadway shows while attending NYU but I got my fill of them on this trip. Both sold out productions with standing ovation crowds at Matilda and Newsies, Audrey loved it and was excited. I got to see David Byrne's Here Lies Love at the Public which was really a great and unique production about a historical time span in the Philippines as told/sung musically from Imelda Marcos' point of view. It will roll out nationally and when it hits your town...don't hesitate - go see it!
     But for all the fun that we had as tourists (I do admit it :(  ) I don't think I could do the NYC grind today. The subways, the noise, the dirt, the smells - all familiar but I wouldn't CHOOSE to do it anymore. In LA, I have my car and my solace of the 20 minute drive to work. The heat can reach 105 degrees but I have my central air conditioning and the local mall 2 minutes from my house to escape cabin fever. Am I a Whimp? Have I lost my edge? or is it just that I am a Rapidly Aging Hipster...you decide.

I seem to always get stuck behind all the single ladies at the market. And it's funny how the conveyor belt represents some kind of personal space.I mean they give you those tiny dividing bars to keep your goods separated from the person behind you. How dare you place your bread next to my tomatoes! But we all know that you can't help but take a look at what the person ahead of you is placing on that belt. Sometimes I do it because I'm bored and sometimes I do it because I'm curious. The assesments in my thought bubble are quick and succinct.Green beans and salmon, he's healthy. A pint of chocolate ice cream, she's had a hard day. Chef Boyardee and Oreos, looks like dad is in charge of dinner. But that quick game I play while I'm waiting for my turn to get scanned turns to wonder when I'm stuck behind the slightly older single lady with Vodka and cat food. A cliche before my eyes and ahead of me...yes. But I start to build a scenario that can work its way into a story or maybe even a song. Vodka and cat food, she lives alone and her bbf(best beast friend) is obviously a cat probably a tabby. The vodka to me indicates sadness. She is going home to pour a glass and drink and stare out the window of her 1 bedroom apartment on Coldwater. She works at a menial low paying job that she hates and she can't wait to pay the cashier and get back to hide from the outside world here that is Ralph's.My mind starts to begin the build of how she came to LA to "make it" only to be cast as a perpetual extra and then... The lady with the Vodka is looking at my goods taking stock of what I've put on the belt. Dino chicken, eggs, milk, bananas, carrots,a pack of burger patties, a loaf of bread. I've been outed. I RAH who obviously has children and lives in a neatly manicured 3 bedroom home with a driveway AND a minivan. Then comes the tilt of the head. It's like the slow motion effect in a movie. Scene: her eyes affixed on the contents placed on the checkout line. Her head slowly moves from looking down to tilting up and back towards the person behind her. And here it comes....it takes all of the Vodka lady's energy to muster up a solemn, weak smile. For a moment her face brightens and then retracts back to its melancholy state.
That attempted smile gets me. That one non verbal gesture sent a telepathic jumble of words into my brain.
Hi miss mom. I could have been you. I could have been buying Dino chicken for my kids if I didn't spend all my time dedicating it to my craft of acting. The days slipped into years that slipped into a decade or two. I still get calls from my agent...Occasionally. But I know that my breakout role is coming soon. So now I'm going to pay so I can get out of your way and go back to my apartment to wait for the phone to ring. Vodka and cat food. It gets me every time.

We were at Knott's Berry Farm the other day and lo and behold the theme park gods broke out the Franklin costume. I couldn't resist and had to take a picture. When was the last time you got to photo op with the only 1950s African-American member of the Peanuts gang? I always thought Franklin was the coolest maybe second to Snoopy. He had that beat poet vibe personna in the cartoon that I could relate to and somehow probably influenced the development of "cool like dat" hip hop. At least in my mind.

The holidays are gone. I have mixed feelings. I love my family but there is always an underlying feeling of melancholy during that time of year and a sense of relief now that it's over. Presents - check. Tree - check. Lights - check. I do have a whole lot to be thankful for but then again something seemed to be missing. When that sinking feeling starts to inch it's way in I turn to Christmas music to keep those dark thoughts at bay. Not your traditional tunes but mostly quirky covers and irreverent originals. "Frosty The Snowman" and "Winter Wonderland" by Cocteau Twins gets me in a better mood as well as The Kink's "Father Christmas" and "Fairytale of New York" by The Pogues. The Ramone's "Merry Christmas I Don't Wanna Fight Tonight" always makes me laugh and The Waitresses' "Christmas Wrapping" is an 80s Classic. I'll add more tunes like this to the list for next year.